Managing Self Personal Development Problem solving

I’m not figuring it out

Written by Jill Farmer

I am no longer trying to figure everything out.

It recently hit me.

Figure out is a cover story for me.

“Don’t try the new thing until you have it all figured out.”

“I just need to figure out how to stop feeling _________.”

“I just need to figure out how to stop being _________. “

“I just need to figure out how to stop doing ________.”

I hear it a lot from my clients.

“Once I figure out what I want to do with my life, then I can move forward.”

What if we don’t need to keep figuring it all out?

What if we are just supposed to be?

Fully present.

In this moment.

What if it’s already figured out?

What if homeostasis, flow, God, the Universe have it figured out and we can reach up and co-create with that in every single moment?

I’m not taking away your ability to dream, or plan and map out ideas or plans.

I’m not robbing you of innovating and creating.

I’m just hypothesizing that we dream, plan, map out, innovate and CREATE so much better when we no longer need to have it all figured out BEFORE we start dreaming, planning, mapping out, innovating and creating.

Figuring out, for lots of us, is really more aptly translated as “I need to stew about everything that could go wrong in this new/uncertain/brave thing. So, I’ll just stay here in paralyzed inaction because I haven’t yet figured it out yet.”

What if, instead of:

“Don’t try the new thing until you have it all figured out.”

You can try it, or be it, or do it even if you’re nowhere near figuring it out?

Instead of:

“I just need to figure out how to stop feeling _________.”

You actually need to START feeling, or let yourself really feel your feelings, so they can move through you instead of staying bottled up, wreaking havoc in sneaky and toxic ways.

What if, instead of:

“Once I figure out what I want to do with my life, then I can move forward.”

You actually let go of the thing that is no longer working? (The job, relationship, situation)? What if you let the old one peacefully be complete even before you had what’s next totally figured out?

What if you will never figure it out, and that’s exactly as it should be?

I certainly don’t have anything figured out, my friends.

I’m just here to love, learn, connect, delight, feel, grieve, rejoice, and be.

Here.

Now.

About the author

Jill Farmer

I love helping people get more meaningful work done in less time. I am the author of "There's Not Enough Time... and Other Lies We Tell Ourselves" which debuted as a bestseller in the Time Management Category on Amazon. In 2015, The Washington Post named me to its 21-Day Time Hacker team. I travel the world delivering keynotes and seminars for top corporations and organizations. I am also a wife and the mother of two teens and I have the two worst-behaved dogs in the universe. You can reach me at jill@jillfarmercoaching.com or visit my website JillFarmer.com.

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