Balance Goals Managing Self

Asking for Help

Written by Denise Mortati

I’m the type who tries to do everything myself. I don’t like asking others for help; I feel like I need to solve or resolve all my issues on my own.

In my professional life, this causes me a lot of stress, as I often feel that maybe I’m missing something, and can use another perspective to help me review a client issue.

In my personal life, the issues just become magnified as I try to work through them, and I become increasingly anxious.

And all I need to do is speak up. Let others know what I’m struggling with. Be vulnerable. Ask for support, comfort, encouragement, backup or information.

Asking for help is not a sign of weakness. It’s actually a show of strength. It allows us to admit that we don’t have all the answers, and that we sometimes need assistance in order to see things from a different angle. It provides us with a way of research that doesn’t involve opening a book or an Internet search.

And asking for help, in turn, allows others to feel comfortable enough to come to us when they need a hand. We would never turn down a friend in need, or a colleague’s request for assistance. And so, we should look at this from the same perspective: others do not find us annoying or difficult when we need help. They understand that we are all in it together, all searching for answers, all needing a little boost now and then. It draws us closer to others, and brings us to a better understanding of the give and take of a relationship.

Call to action: What issue are you struggling with? Who can you ask for help? Take a step and make a phone call or an appointment to get support.

As always, let me know your thoughts and progress! And if you like this blog, please share this, and visit my website at to subscribe!

About the author

Denise Mortati

My legal coaching practice helps attorneys rediscover their passion and look forward every day to a fulfilling career. I do this through one-on-one, group and corporate coaching, using specialized techniques and practices that help to clarify goals and priorities, and balance work and personal time. I support clients in finding peace in their careers and within themselves. I’m also a practicing attorney in a solo practice, so I, too, am “walking the walk” with my clients! I feel that my life’s mission is to change the paradigm of what a law career is “supposed” to be. Contact me at or visit my website,

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